The Need for Moods

MoodsAll

Sep 21

Everyone has them. They are good, bad, happy, irritated, sour, angry, etc. I have noticed that we as individuals are okay with being in a bad mood, but when others around us are in a bad mood, we feel bothered by it and often we wonder if it is our fault or if they are mad at us. It is easy to personalize the moods of another person, even though we have our own mood ranges and they are not caused by the people around us. This worry about the moods of others can extend to partners, family members, siblings, coworkers, etc. Any place there are relationships, there is an opportunity for this.

Thoughts:

What I have learned is that we should see a range of moods and emotions as a positive. We nned those around us to not be happy all the time, it means they are well-rounded emotionally. We also need them to be human and feel all things, not just the happy ones.. This is not to say that we should put up with some actions related to negative moods such as blame or abuse. Everyone is responsible for their own moods and managing them. Everyone has bad days, but it doesn’t entitle anyone to make people receptors for those bad days and moods.
It is so freeing to not personalize the moods of others and just focus on being present and kind and allow other people to have a variety of feelings and moods. This is still the same even when there is conflict between two people, although I have found many worry about the moods of others when there has been no conflict. There is almost a self-centered quality when we think; “what did I do? Is that person mad at me?” None of us are that important that all the moods and feelings of another person are about us. And for the same reason, all our moods and feelings are not about another person, we are all too self-focused at our core. We need to allow ourselves and those around us to have a variety of moods and emotions and know that all feelings and moods are okay, it is just what we do with them that matters. We do not want to send the message or teach the next generation that is not okay to have a bad mood, it is absolutely okay to have a bad mood. A bad mood just may mean that there is a separation from being in another person’s presence until they are feeling better or giving them comfort if that is what they need.

Takeaway:

If we can accept when those around us have bad days and moods and continue to act loving, then we probably have the best chance of helping them out of it and being there to listen when they want to talk.